Monday, November 09, 2015
Apartment Hunting in Miami Dade County's Eastern Corridor. By Geniusofdespair
In Coconut Grove you had better be rich. A decent modern apartment will cost you around $5,000 a month with a water view. I went to a real estate agent in the Grove and they wouldn't even bring me out with my budget of under $3,000. They told me to look on Craig's list. Meanwhile in the Herald today they said the average rental price was $1.98 per square foot. I want 1,300 square foot -- which would put me in the $2,574 range. NOT HAPPENING!
I come from New York City. I do like walking around a city. I am adverse to living downtown even though my ideal locations would be South of Margaret Pace Park and North of Arsht (or Brickell). Why? I don't want to hear a plane fly over all the time. I already moved once because of airplane traffic. Does anyone downtown have really good windows (Maybe triple pane) that will block out the airplane sound? What building are you in? I looked at the MIA traffic patterns and it is alarming how many planes are flying over and they are loud. Young ears must be accustomed to the sound -- IPods full blast, etc. By the way, I haven't been to Mary Brickell Village in a while and I didn't even recognize it. There are a few places in my price range but gee, I don't want to wake up at 5 am. with a cargo plane lumbering over my building. They fly at night, cheaper. And don't say I will get used to it. I won't. I can't believe the air traffic in Wynwood, even though that is Miami's version of Soho, I can't live there even though it has gotten trendy.
Second, in a two bedroom in today's market, you are looking at 900 to 1,100 square feet. I went in one 1,100 square foot apartment and was shocked. I would have to get a divorce to fit. You have to be in your 20's with no stuff. I have stuff. Lots of stuff. Where would I put it all? I already pared down from a house to a townhouse of 1,600 square feet. I guess books are off limits. I don't know what to do with my inherited set of china and all the rest of my accumulated treasures. I collect rocks from my trips. I need at least 1,300 square feet. In terms of new buildings, that is a 3 bedroom. I wonder if they count the terrace in the square footage? In the photos of the older, larger apartments I can afford, I have actually seen the same kitchen cabinets I had in 1982, you know the ones, white with oak edges.
Why do I want to move? All my friends are down South and all the meeting I want to attend are down South. There is mass transit South. Not up here. I want to be a better pseudo-reporter and I can't do it from my office. I need to experience it, see who is attending meetings because that is the key. I need to be where the action is and I hate driving in the God-awful traffic, now it is all day not just at rush hour. And, by now, you must all know I am lazy.
Find me a place to live where I can walk to a downtown. I would be a good tenant. I only have virtual pets, my dog Smokey and my cat Smokey. I will only rent in a flood zone, not buy.
I just wrote my will. I said: Cremate me but make sure you put my ashes somewhere high.