Sunday, January 04, 2015

Holy Shit. By Geniusofdespair

Witnesses' Reading material

I was coming down this mountain in New Mexico when what do I run into: Jehovah's Witnesses standing next to a tripod they set up. I love Witnesses. Even on the rugged mountain they had on their requisite suits and ties. We had a lively conversation, I said I rejected them because they didn't celebrate birthdays. They gave me reading material all the same. They said I was the only one who would talk to them.

Watch Out! Witnesses at the bottom of the mountain.

I must have a sign on my back "looking for religion". The Mormons were all over me in Salt Lake City.

Salt Lake City Mormon Cathedral. They Wouldn't let you in unless you belonged to the faith. But walking on the grounds, they have converters following you with happy smiles and canned messages of faith. I rejected them because they don't drink.  I saw about 10 marriages the day I was there. I got to see the choir for free (below).  It is in a different building. Apparently they film a TV show every Sunday and anyone can join the audience as long as you are quiet. It is a live show. No shouting "Jehovah's Witnesses is the way to go." I took these two photos!!!

I just threw this in, it is the receding Salt Lake. It is filled with millions (maybe trillions) of brine shrimp just waiting to set up home in your ears. I kept my ears out of the water. It was a weird experience and a bit smelly. Only weirdos swim in the water. Certainly not the Mormons.  My spouse put ears in, perhaps that is why I hear "WHAT?" all day. There must be a brine shrimp clump  that set up shop in both ears. If I hear "WHAT" one more time I am going to dig them out with a fork.


Anonymous said...

Hilarious! Thanks for posting. I love your humor.

Anonymous said...

You forgot to mention JW's don't salute the Flag or celebrate Christmas.
They're good people tho
it's nice you talked to them

Gus said...

Brine shrimp are better known as "sea monkeys." Great post!

Geniusofdespair said...

Sea monkeys? Gross. I was swimming in a sea monkey pit of water? They didn't feel like anything. I guess I will survive. Where is that fork.