Saturday, May 30, 2009

Lobbyists: a novel way to remove pythons from the Everglades ... by gimleteye

"If we can send someone to the moon, we can figure out how to get rid of these snakes." Florida Wildlife Commissioner Ron Bergeron. ('Open Season on Glades Python', St. Pete Times, May 28, 2009)

I like the idea of a bounty for snake hunters to extract Burmese python from the Everglades. Here's an idea that even Ron Bergeron could embrace: include the bounty as part of the licensing fee for lobbyists in any of the counties ringing the Everglades.

Lobbyists get a bad rap. They are called snake oil salesmen. Or, oily as a snake. Think of how the lobbyists' reputation could be enhanced by capturing snakes as a condition of their registration to lobby.

Here is the plan: for every registration, one python is part of the fee. Now being a realist, I would never expect a lobbyist to get his wing tips wet chasing Burmese pythons. Let lobbyists pay for and hire bounty hunters from their own bounty fees.

I would add the condition that the lobbyist must produce a photo, with a time and date stamp, taken with the killed snake at an Everglades National Park weighing station. Maybe the penalty for faking the photo could be a night spent in the Everglades hunting snakes with one of the guys in the picture, above. Does it sound reasonable to you, too?

6 comments:

Mr. Freer said...

This blog should be required reading for anyone who wants to vote. The people about to vote need to know about the people behind the scenes pulling the levers!

Anonymous said...

Nah, I think the lobbyists should catch their own snakes. That will keep them out of county hall.

Mensa said...

Shucks, I thought that lobbyists were the snakes.

Anonymous said...

I am available to be a lobbyist bounty hunter!

Anonymous said...

#4: What kind of bait do you prefer?
I find the scent of cash works well, but am looking for something a bit less pricey. Any suggestions?

Anonymous said...

#5 - Free construction on a McMansion and discounted land for that McMansion - at least for a certain BCC member. But, heck, it may work for others! And, according to the Miami Dade County Ethics department - it's legal and ethical.