A new hot political situation has popped-up in the streets of Miami. Politics and Sex, what more can you hope for?It ‘s those darn peacocks again! Not that the issue is paticularly new to the county, the Peacock Wars have been raging on and off for years in the south end of the county. However, being that everything in life is particularly sensitive this election year, we need to take a closer look at this ugly situation. The politics of peafowl should be simple. They are a non-native bird well protected by law in Miami-Dade County. It is the sex thing that is really touchy this election season.
Peacocks (those are the males) like harems; and the females (peahens) in the harem like to boink. The gals being gals choose their honeys according to the size, color, and quality of the feather trains. As a result of fancy peacock wooing, each peahen in the harem usually lays 2 to 6 eggs at a time and will lay them multiple times a year, if they are pleased with their guy. So creative thinkers in the City of Miami have been mulling over the idea of the birdie birth control pill.
This is a national issue, not just one affecting local politics. Think about it! The nationwide concern of right to life rears its ugly head right here in the neighborhoods of Miami. Do we ban birdie birth control pills because of religious dogma? Do we call in birdie sex educators and appease the “abstinence” party (Just Say No, Ms. Peahen)? Or should a City Staffer call Peta to come in and lovingly coax these darlings to go live in the Redland with Sidney and his existing flock? Peta can even do group therapy to help get the urban harems adjusted to living in what’s left of the rural outlands of Miami-Dade County.
All that being said, peafowl are piercingly loud, aggressive, and can do a lot of damage to homes and yards. So, it is not unusual for the neighborhoods to eventually fall out of love with them. Donald Chauncey from South Miami noted in an August 13, 2008 Herald Letter to the Editor, the claim that peafowl have eliminated speeders in his neighborhood. Take note Police chiefs. Peafowl do not need a motorcycle or even a radar gun to achieve this goal---the birds just simply stroll at a cat-like saunter in front of oncoming vehicles. Traffic comes to a standstill while the peafowl mosey. What a deal! Peacocks save government money.
But, Mr. Chauncey also states, “Yes, I hose down my car and sidewalks frequently. I close my windows during spring mating season.”
Anyone who has lived around peafowl, also know exactly what Mr. Chauncey speaks of: Poop. Big piles of slimy poop. Poop on the stoop. Poop on the pool screens (and screaming peacocks falling through the screens; hey, they float!).
Just in case you naively think State Farm is any more simpatico to your peacock issue than your county government, think again: they have “bird” damage exclusions in their policies. All of us may as well be happy, the birds are. My advice to those impacted by Peacock infestation: Just hit the bank, buy ear plugs, get a high powered hose, fix the roof and screen damage. Don’t forget to replant your Begonias. Peacocks love those too!
4 comments:
Thanks for the biology lesson. Never knew Peacocks were the males. I assumed they were female because of the feathers.
I used to live off of Royal Palm and Main Highway (By the Carrollton School) and it's true, there were upwards of 10 Peacocks on my block. It didn't really bother me too much, although they did jump all over cars and roof tops and it sounded like someone strangling a cat some mornings.
I say, let 'em be. It's the Grove and it adds to the eclectic charm of the area.
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P.S. I've started to see them around the central Gables now too.
I see more peafowl these days than blue jays and mocking birds. They are all over Kendall, the Redland, Palmetto Bay and Cutler Bay.
The cats and dogs ignore them. I have replaced a flat roof at least three times as a result of their mating dances on top of it. Currently, the pool screens are gone, the last mating season, I took photos of 2 peacocks fighting in the middle of the panel.
They are very territorial and will chase or fly at you if they get the urge in their little bird brains.
If you can imagine it, a peacock weighs between 8.5-13 pounds and is one of the largest flying birds when you take into consideration the 5 foot length of its tail and its wide wingspan. They make wop wop wop noise as they fly at you!
I have learned to run fast and dodge the smelly caca. And no, I do not feed them.
This is my first foray into the peacock issue. It's 2015 and this blog is from 2008(?) but it was the first relevant item to come up on my Goigle search. What's happened in all these years?
I would like to see some population control ordinances of some sort or legislation. We can't possibly be helpless in the face of the run away breeding in the absence of natural predators. I don't mind seeing a few of these birds occasionally in our neighborhoods but it's gotten out of hand at least in Palmetto Bay.
Let me know please if there is any organized anti peacock movement!
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