Monday, April 02, 2007

Embrace jellyfish, solve global warming by gimleteye


“A set of special eyes, similar to our own, keeps venomous box jellyfish from pumping into obstacles as they swim across the ocean floor, a new study finds.”

Which species to mankind will emerge from global warming to succeed our domination of the planet?

It could be any one of the “weedy” species that thrive on waste byproducts. Rodents and roaches, come to mind, as species likely to outlast us.

Jellyfish have been around for tens of millions of years.

Oceana, which campaigns for the world’s oceans, attributes the rise in the number of jellyfish to a rise in water temperatures because of climate change. An Oceana scientist said, “We have found jellyfish all over the Mediterranean… wherever we look, there is practically nowhere without jellyfish.”

We’ve been boating off the coast of South Florida near the Gulfstream and seen so many jellyfish we thought they’d clog our propeller. They were the size of small umbrellas.

Last week, a Hollywood movie filming off the coast of Australia was halted because of jellyfish. “A deadly species of jellyfish, translucent and the size of a thumbnail, is spreading along Australia’s coastline as a result of global warming, scientists warned today.”

So we vote for the jellyfish to trump mankind and even survive lobbyists who are prevailing on legislatures to inhibit bans on pollution and other measures to stop global warming.

To get Congress and state and local legislatures to act on global warming, here’s our recommendation: make industry lobbyists as a condition of their registration float in a tank filled with a benign species of jellyfish for twenty-four hours.

Do the same for legislators as a required duty before taking office.

Jellyfish are disgusting and sometimes deadly, but they can have curative powers too.

2 comments:

Geniusofdespair said...

Are jellyfish your "Karma Correcting" mechanism?

Anonymous said...

I know a commissioner who could go into the dunk tank with the manatees. ;-)