Scoop!: letter from Jeb! to Charlie Crist! The Five Principles ... by gimleteye

Dear Charlie,

I slept on your offer last night. Yes! Let bygones be bygone. I will be the next US Senator from Florida and accept your appointment to fill the remaining term of Mel Martinez, the last man our team recruited to fill the job. While I say, yes!, there are conditions that should be agreed upon by your signature, beginning with the assurance that this letter remains private, between us, and not leaked at any time especially to the blogs. To verify and proceed, please click 'read more'.

First, your assurance that you will fight the next US Supreme Court nominee from the Obama. By fight, I mean that you will become engaged in mainstream Republican politics.

Second, you must not ever appear in a photo with the Obama. Not by his side. Not at his shoulder. And not at his table.

Third, you will support Marco Rubio to be governor of Florida in 2014. During this campaign, in 2014, you will appear with me in photos on my left side, which would be my right side facing the camera.

Fourth, that following your 2010 victory for US Senate-- which I will support -- you will staff 50 percent plus one of positions within your office according to their prior service during my administrations as governor in Tallahassee.

Fifth, you will not support immigration reform like Mel Martinez. The immigrants are voting for our common enemy: Democrats. When you appear before Hispanic audiences during your campaign, you will invite me to interpret your speech in two sentence intervals. You speak two sentences. I interpret two sentences. You will agree that James Baker, my father's former chief of staff and Secretary of State, will adjudicate any and all disputes as to what we meant, when we said it.

Under these five principles, I humbly accept your appointment to serve out the remaining three years of Senator Mel Martinez' term. You will agree to these conditions by signing your name and clicking the "publish" button. With deep respect,

Jeb!