Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Caskets: Such a deal at Costco! by geniusofdespair


You would expect someone who is in despair to spot a bargain on coffins. And I did!

You can save up to 20% planning your funeral or buying your casket through Costco. I flipped through the brochure, trying to imagine which coffin I would like to spend eternity in and I decided on "The Morgan" at $799. The feature I most liked was the Sunburst Head Panel. In the right light (I had to enhance the photo so you could see it) I think it could look like a radiating halo. That could be very cool but what if my relatives skimp on the lighting - you would need a beam positioned just so.

If I get more religious I might opt for "The Lady of Guadalupe but there is no Sunburst head panel which is okay in retrospect, because the relatives will not do the lighting, I just know it. There is, however, pin striping on this one and that could look very sporty.

The one cheap thing about the Lady of Guadalupe coffin...sorry I mean casket (the word they seem to prefer): all the handles have appliques with a picture of the Lady of Guadalupe on them. The appliques consisted of a material similary to contact paper, not designed to last an eternity like the 18 gauge steel, gasketed casket. The Morgan is sans appliques and I think that gives a richer look.

All the caskets had an adjustable bed and mattress as an added feature. I was thinking: "What for, in case I want to sit up?"

By the time I left Costco I decided I am not going to buy The Morgan or the pricey Kentucky Rose ($1,299.99) my spouse's favorite. I think cremation is the way to go...just get sprinkled around a tree...if there are any left by the time I kick the bucket.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Very funny, something I don't usually think about and laugh at.

Anonymous said...

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

- Woody Allen, "Without Feathers" - (1976)

Anonymous said...

Truly Blue

Now I am really blue, thinking about death and caskets.

Wait a minute--I'm a veteran watcher of HBO's Six-Feet Under. I think cremation is the way to go.

Or for the environmentalist in me, an environmentally sensitive burial under a tree over-looking a bluff in my town...scratch that, we don't live in California.

O.K. Just spread my ashes onto the Hialeah Race Track/Big Box stores...whatever is there by the time I die or am killed.

Love this blog!

Anonymous said...

excellent post indeed.

i just want something that will keep the vermin out for as long as possible

Anonymous said...

I want no muss and no muss. And don't tell me what you intend to do with me. Just do it quietly, without involving the world.

Anonymous said...

The Morgan is very smart looking. I would go with that one.